The Reason For This Season

In those days Caesar Augustus issued a decree that a census should be taken of the entire Roman world. (This was the first census that took place while Quirinius was governor of Syria.) And everyone went to his own town to register.

So Joseph also went up from the town of Nazareth in Galilee to Judea, to Bethlehem the town of David, because he belonged to the house and line of David. He went there to register with Mary, who was pledged to be married to him and was expecting a child.

While they were there, the time came for the baby to be born, and she gave birth to her firstborn, a son. She wrapped him in cloths and placed him in a manger, because there was no room for them in the inn.

And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. But the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger."

Suddenly, a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, "Glory to God in the highest and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests."

When the angels had left them and gone into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, "Let's go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about."

So they hurried off and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby, who was lying in the manger. When they had seen him, they spread the word concerning what had been told them about this child, and all who heard it were amazed at what the shepherds said to them.

But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart. The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen, which were just as they had been told.

Encouragement for the week of Christmas:

If you have never heard this story before, the above is a recount of what was seen and heard at the time of the birth of Jesus Christ from the book of Luke (Chapter 2) in the Bible.

Jesus is the reason for this season, for He came to save you and me so that we may know the joy, hope, and peace that can only be found in the saving grace of Jesus Christ.

You can ask Him into your heart today to know and have the security of His unconditional love and full acceptance of who you are, just as you are.

You can trust Jesus, who came as a babe, and died as a man on a Cross for you. You can trust Him today.

Elementary, My Dear Watson!

**The middle school I attended in Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan**

A lot of activity went down in the hallowed halls of this school. Many a school crush of mine was trampled under the feet of uninterested boys. In spite of the letters I wrote to many declaring my strong infatuation, alas, my sentiments were never returned.

When you're a hormonal and emotionally challenged teen, even the slightest hint of rejection can set you on a course to self-doubt. Plus the fact that the mind is always forming and changing, causing brain chemistry and hormones to become a roller coaster ride, making life crazy.

It did for me, anyway, and I often felt like an outcast. Trying to fit in and be a part of something...anything in school life, seemed to be critical. Each move someone took was dissected over bagged lunches and recess wandering.

Cliques had a way of developing fast and changes to those cliques, even faster. You never knew from day to day if you were the ally or the enemy. Those were some of the weirdest years of my life.

Alliances were established by the kind of lip gloss one happened to stumble upon from a commercial they saw or another strolling in with the latest style of jeans. No wonder most kids were dazed and confused throughout their academia career. I know I was.

While those may have been the formative years, I'm glad they weren't the deciding factor in whether or not I am accepted today. That no matter what style of boot I may don or the brand of bag I carry, those hold nothing to what I, hope, I've developed in character.

That in spite of the cruel and crass school days, it's with an elementary simplicity that, today, I ensure I'm a woman of character who will welcome and love those who feel left out. To not judge someone because of their attitude, for you don't know what's happening behind the scenes of their life.

As we come closer to the reason behind this season, Jesus Christ, may our looks be loving, our hands extending, and our hearts ever welcoming to whoever we encounter. Let our love and joy be evident to those who long to be accepted.

Encouragement for the week:

As it gets closer to Christmas, my friend, may you know that I love and accept you for exactly who you are. Just as Jesus Christ loves and accepts you.

If you are a Christian reading this, you know that you are accepted unconditionally by your Father in heaven. May that be a strong principal you shine onto others.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. You need to know that Christ died so that you could know His unconditional acceptance and love for you, no matter what. His sacrifice for you was real and you can trust Him.

Awkward!

**My Grade 4 school photo.**

There comes a time in many people's lives when awkwardness sets in. Whether in action, speech or appearance, our peculiarities emerge. While we may not have been able to pinpoint the moment in which we became artless, mine happened around the time of entering Grade 4.

The distinct bowl-shaped bangs and thick man brows that graced my face, were obvious and less than flattering. Not exactly a portrait of my younger and, certainly, more attractive years.

You might be thinking that the description I just presented of myself is a wee bit deprecating in nature. On the contrary. It's simply a retrospect of what my mind captured as I zoomed in to take the picture for this post, not a true reflection of how I see myself today.

The interesting thing about me now is that even though I can point out the apparent deficiencies of my looks back then, I can confidently say that I grew out of my awkwardness eventually. Just as we all have and will, even though we fail to realize an important reality.

What we conceived to be embarrassing or unbecoming of ourselves was as a result of a frame of reference having been formed by something or someone, at some time. We believed it and lived life based on that inaccurate depiction.

So, let me speak a truth to you that no one else but Jesus will tell you. And it's a truth that many people will reject because our world is so overbearing and unapologetic when voicing its opinion of you. Let me help you form a new frame of reference.

One of many mentions of this truth can be found in the Bible, within a book called Song of Songs. I believe it is God's love letter to His children. Within the fourth chapter, it declares my truth to you as this, "All beautiful you are, my darling; there is no flaw in you." (Verse 7 - replace beautiful with handsome and this applies to all you fellas too)

As blundering or self-conscious you may perceive yourself to be, it's not accurate. It's not the truth. Not only were you created, but you were beautiful before you were ever born. That beauty never has or ever will, stop. Don't let the world make you buy into its skewed truth. In God's eyes I know I am flawless and so are you.

Encouragement for the week:

Beloved, there is no truth in what the messed up world tries to feed you. You are beautiful.

If you are a Christian reading this, you know that God is perfect, therefore, He makes no imperfect thing. That's where you came in. Remember that there is no junk in the kingdom of God. Wear your beauty with grace and confidence.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. He has made all things beautiful, that means you. Open your heart to Jesus today, friend, and you can know and live the confidence of your beauty.

Looking Back

**Christmas of 1981, at nine years old. **

Ten little fingers, ten little toes;
that's how I entered the world.

You welcomed me straight into your arms;
No questions asked, love opened wide.

You coddled and kissed;
No moment you missed.
A little one now looked to you to lead.

The parties, the pictures;
All special occasions captured on film.

This precious girl you looked at with joy;
Your dreams and hopes to come alive.

My life didn't always flow as planned;
There were hurts and scrapes along the way.

Never did you leave my side;
Or cease your daily prayers.

That I would be all that I could;
With your instruction and discipline.

At times I rebelled;
But you never faltered in teaching me goodness.

Respecting others, working hard;
You helped build my strong foundation.

Using manners and being honest;
You modeled before my eyes.

Even though I was too young to appreciate your efforts;
It was never lost as I aged.

Right now, in looking back;
You did the very best for me.

No holding back, no giving in;
Your love, in ways, saved me.

For it was the door that stayed ajar;
To receive the Savior later.

A blessed friend, committed parents;
It all came to a moment.

Of looking back with gratitude;
And living a godly, purpose filled life.


This open prose is dedicated to my parents who remained faithful in loving this little girl who once was lost, but now is found. I love you both.

Encouragement for the week:

Never underestimate the power of the love and prayers of your parents, beloved.

Checked Out

**A 1982 photo of me and my best friend, Grandpa Siroski.**

After you book a trip, and it comes time to go to the airport, you have to begin by checking in. The details of your flight itinerary and baggage are confirmed and the check-in process is completed. You go through security, find your gate, sit down and wait until your designated plane is prepared and boarding begins.

In your indicated seat, you become fully aware that you will soon depart and your trip will commence. For many, a trip is a highly anticipated excursion and you're now looking forward to reaching the final destination. As a traveler, you are fully checked in and present. Let the excitement begin!

But what if your circumstances change and the predicament you're checking into is brutal and heart wrenching? The photo I chose for this post shows happiness and contentment. I'm standing beside my best friend, the center of my universe.

The picture taken was also mere years prior to my grandfather's death from cancer. His death broke me. It turned my world upside down and I couldn't deal with it so I checked out. As adults, my sister has told me that I never cried at his funeral. She couldn't understand why I didn't because of my close relationship with him. I had no recollection of that heart wrenching day.

I think I kept myself from crying and grieving so that I wouldn't lose my mind and never recover. However, because I checked out during that time in my life, it has taken me decades to fully grieve his passing and it was far more difficult than if I had only allowed myself to feel whatever needed to be felt back then.

Be that as it may, there is no set timeline for grieving nor is there any correct way to grieve. The danger lies in checking out, isolation, and disconnecting from others, especially those who love you. Not only does grieving need to happen, but mourning also. While grieving may be a singular action - a song plays reminding you of the person, a smell makes you sob uncontrollably because that's how they used to smell - mourning is a communal action.

It brings you into the proximity of another person to whom you can grieve publicly. That sounds uncomfortable. However, if you have someone who allows you to go through the rainbow of emotions that happen when you lose a beloved one, that's when you're checked back in and possess the ability to express yourself freely.

Be heart broken. Have an ugly cry. Be mad. Allow yourself to feel what you're feeling, out loud, and until the pain isn't as drowning or overwhelming. Let it out. When I'm saddened by loss, I'm thankful that the Bible speaks to the importance of loss. In a book called Ecclesiastes it says that there is, "...a time to mourn and a time to dance..." (Chapter 3, Verse 4b). It assigns a season to mourning. This process is a natural time in our lives, as unfortunate as it is when it happens.

As a Christian woman, I have found benefit in weeping and mourning, especially during times of loss. We were created to be feeling beings. We weren't meant to be isolated or checked out from life's pain. Allow yourself to mourn for this season then let life move you forward. It doesn't mean you're discounting the passing of your loved one. It means you're allowing yourself to be you, the you that God intended you to be.

Encouragement for the week:

Beloved, it's okay to cry and feel all that's in you during this time of pain and loss. Expressing deep emotion is a part of who you were created to be.

If you are a Christian reading this, you know that God didn't create you to be one dimensional. Allow yourself to feel and live life forward as you grieve. Continue to trust that God can and will get you through it all.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. Don't be afraid to feel during times of loss - it is a part of life. A relationship with Jesus will enable you to live life in the midst of unbearable pain. Jesus is the way to peace in loss. You can trust Him when you ask Him to come into your heart and help you navigate life.

Who's That Girl?

**Photo of me on a 1978 fishing trip with my grandparents**

Daddy's little girl, grandpa's favorite grandchild, Mommy's eager helper, and an older sister's worst nightmare. These were just some of the titles I accumulated over the young years of my life. Include the picture above and you could add adventurous boater and fisherman.

Driving my grandfather's boat for the first time was both exciting and terrifying. I wanted to go on a tear but also make my grandpa proud. He didn't let just anyone captain his vessel. Needless to say, that was a monumental day for me and I caught a big jack fish too.

Nowadays, a lot of our young girls define who they are through the lens of others and social media. Much of what streams to their eyes and ears are that they don't cut it according to the superficial expectations that movies, songs, and TV portray.

That they fall short in one or more areas that society, and even 'friends' state is required to 'fit in'. May I just say, that's total junk and completely unrealistic. I fought that while growing up and it resulted in devastating results.

Like crushed self-esteem, depression, self-hatred, and a suicide attempt. While I lived to move beyond my harsh younger years, many young women didn't. The pressure was too much. The nonacceptance too scathing. Young, beautiful lives lost. Forever.

Let's do away with the insults and judgments. Instead, let us be people who celebrate our unique differences that were given to us by God when He, so carefully, wove us together in our mother's wombs (Psalm 139:13).

May we embrace, not attack. May we move beyond the superficial standards that the world has felt necessary to impose and love our sisters for the beautiful creations they are. Let's shock the shallow world with what we can do, just as Jesus did without hesitation.

Don't be afraid to be who you are. You are unique for a reason. Only you can do what needs to be done within the world to make it a better place. Be strong and courageous and don't bow down to the world's pressure. Make them ask, "Who's that girl?"

Encouragement for the week:

Sweet girl, there is no one as beautiful and unique as you. Never allow anyone to diminish the radiance your heavenly Father, painstakingly, formed.

If you are a Christian reading this, your power to shine lies within the intricacy your Father had great love to build you with. Be strong enough in Him to embrace your uniqueness and help others to realize theirs.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. God made you. Yes, He did. And He did it through incredible detail with tremendous love. The world will not celebrate your full potential. Only a relationship with Christ can. You can trust Him.

Let's Be Clear

**A picture of me at the age of seven 

with my friends and sister.**

Being young and impressionable has its merits. As a youngster, I was easily impressed by the things my parents and grandparents did, only because I didn't carry the size or strength to pull off the task.

I was also easily moved by the things my friends and sister did. I would follow the patterns and behaviors I saw whether they were fitting for me or not. I'm sure there may have been an innate knowledge that some of the things I was copying, weren't always beneficial.

What ever the case, my individualism may wasn't as obvious in my younger years as it is now. Being able to think for myself wasn't as imperative as a young girl.  Mimicking everyone else and being in the accepted crowd was far more essential.

Compromise was a far reaching taboo for this awkward lass. Instead, I walked a fine line between nice and naughty in an effort to ensure a certain cute and innocent profile, even though the rebel inside teetered on the edge of mayhem.

What can I say? I didn't exactly put my choices under a microscope before making them at that age. None of us did. We just wanted to have fun. That's what childhood was all about.

Pushing the limits, fighting to fit in, gaining acceptance from our peers, and standing out in a crowd were our life goals. Nothing else really mattered.

Looking at my life today, as a Christian woman, I have a completely different thought process. It's more about becoming the right person, being compassionate, and staying true to my beliefs and convictions. No compromise allowed.

No, that doesn't mean forming legalistic ideologies. It's quite the opposite. It's about sharing a meaningful relationship with God and living by specific and inalienable principles because they keep me free from physical, emotional and mental harm.

And because of that, they keep me in a caring, compassionate and empathetic posture around others. They allow me to be real and vulnerable while keeping me true to the values and beliefs I will, unequivocally, hold to. No matter what.

In this world, and for the sake of my own sanity, I must hold fast to the things that convict me, because that's the only way I will become the woman God created me to be. And I have to say, that's far more important than anything else the world could possibly offer.

Encouragement for the week:

Sweet girl, don't compromise your heart, mind, or body to fit in to the masses that pressure you. An uncompromising spirit will take you further in ways you never thought possible.

If you are a Christian reading this, God created you to be unwavering in your faith and to be true to your convictions. Continue to look to the Lord for the strength to go against the majority.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. He sees the pain you suffer when you compromise yourself. He longs to protect you from that. Entering into a relationship with Jesus will enable you to stay true to who you are.

Does It Matter?

Growing up in a small town, as I did, afforded our family many benefits. It wasn't just about our family, but a larger family co-existing in the sleepy hamlet. It meant being able to roam and explore with confidence. Where everyone knew each other and each child had others watching out for them - which didn't always work to our favor. Our parents knew we were causing trouble before we ever reached the front door for dinner.

Relationships among neighbors were close, trusting, and rewarding. At any given time, we could walk to a neighbor's house to play or enjoy cookies. I remember walking to the post office that also served as the postal worker's home. She was a pleasant, friendly lady who enjoyed serving. We would chat before I collected the mail and walked back home.

When it came to birthday celebrations, it was common for my parents to bring out a car full of my friends, making it a weekend event. Having my birthday land in the middle of summer, there was badminton, popsicles and other outdoor fun, abound.

As a teenager, I became a trusted sitter for the neighbor kids whose parents could go out knowing their children were in good hands. Great good resided in living the small town life back then where life was simpler. You took time to listen to the stories of your neighbors. There was intentional relationship building in a time of slowed paces. It was comfortable and free without much fighting or disagreement.

We were all created for relationship by God. We each have an innate need for interaction and human connection for that reason. Nowadays, many think that the most meaningful connection is found through the portal of social media. But it's actually tearing us apart, making us incapable of having the simplest of conversations and making new friends.

The other day I went food shopping and was stupefied by what I saw. People were engaged with their phones or plugged into ear buds as they strolled the aisles. Many had their heads down, maybe in hopes of avoiding eye contact. Strange how we have become intricately connected to technology - something that can never return to us what we desperately long for - relationship, acceptance, love, and life meaning.

Not only did God create us to be social beings, but His Word, the Bible is the written essence of interaction and relational intimacy. Brother to brother, husband to wife, grandparent to grandchild - it's all about connecting.

In fact, much of the Bible encourages us to communicate and engage in friendship with one another. One such example comes from a book called Hebrews, which says, "And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another..." (Chapter 10, Verses 24-25)

No man or woman is an island, capable of thriving without human interaction. We were created for so much more than that. May we each be intentional in reaching out to others and connecting on a heart level.

Encouragement for the week:

My friend, as enjoyable or easy social media may be, it will never feed the greatest need of your heart. Your feminine heart requires more than the shallow sentiments social media offers.

If you are a Christian reading this, you know you were created for relationship and interaction with others. Be mindful of the traps that technology uses to isolate. Instead, have intention about interacting with others in person.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. You can find a special relationship and connection with Jesus. He waits to forge a lasting and intimate friendship with you. You can trust Him.

An Intricate Fascination

As a youngster, I had a curious fascination with my surroundings - as you can see from the above picture. At times, observing how a single file caravan of hard working ants could be sent into a furry of confusion because a leaf fell across their set path.

The dynamics of a grasshopper as I held it and marveled in its angled back legs, only to open my hands wide enough to watch it take a giant leap into the air. Or chasing a butterfly while taking in the mosaic of colors seen in its wings. It was a simpler time being fascinated with simpler and more beautiful things.

Nowadays, it seems the world has taken on a morbid fascination with the macabre and disturbing. You don't have to look far to see a focus on death, terror, or fear. A perfect example, as it gets closer to Halloween, is the caliber of horror movies being made.

The scarier and more disturbing, the better it seems. Thanks, but I'll pass. I like to be able to sleep at night. Even in our daily news programs, there isn't a whole lot of good news these days. Mail bombs have been an overriding theme on the news, if you tune in, and now that the person who sent them has been apprehended, the investigation begins.

Weeks will be spent dissecting details using the 'why's', 'when's', 'how's', and 'who's' to determine intent within the misdeed. Investigators, police, psychologists and others will give their professional perspective on the actions and mind of the perpetrator. While all the information will be gathered and presented as a welcome sedative to the minds that long to know, I believe there is a deeper part that is being overlooked - the heart.

I was reminded, through one of my devotionals, that it is the heart that is not only the epicenter of each human being, but also at the bulls-eye of villainy. More to the point, one particular devo said, "Society can punish symptoms over and over, but when behavior is our problem, we need to check the state of our heart. "

Not just when it gets to the point of a massacre or bombing. It needs to start when there's anger in our hearts while engaged in a disagreement with a friend or holding onto a lengthy grudge against a family member or co-worker. Is it safe to say that the state of our heart, at that moment, is nurturing something negative?

The devotional went on to say that, "Spiritual reality produces inward morality, which determines outward activity." If our world comes to the point of demanding an absence of God, I struggle to believe that goodness and love can blossom, never mind exist.

I say this having barely come out of my own self destruction, many years ago. If it were not for the saving grace I experienced in meeting God, this blog would not exist. And I would have never stepped into an unconditional love that fully accepted me in my brokenness.

So I guess it's fair to say that I desire to fascinate in the beautiful, simple things of life. To pray continually for the hearts in a state of confusion, hurt and anger - that they would, some way, somehow, be changed by God. For this once deranged heart was changed because nothing in my life was making sense and the darkness I lived in was preparing to swallow me whole.

However, once it was touched by God's love, I knew there was another option and life became incredible and colorful again. Just as it was while being a little girl.

Encouragement for the week:

Sweet girl, our world is scary but there is shelter that awaits every heart. There is a fascination far greater than anything we can fathom. His name is Jesus and He longs to enter each heart, bringing wonder and awe.

If you are a Christian reading this, you know the fascination you encountered when you first met the Lord. How alive and excited you felt for the first time in your life. How everything around you reflected the majesty and beauty of Jesus. Go back to that time and allow that inner flame of wonder and intrigue to be re-ignited.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. There is no greater fascination than the one you will experience within an intimate relationship with Jesus Christ. You can trust Him to bring you new life, my friend.

Tres Años

There you have it - a simple girl with a simple yellow cake donning three blue candles to mark the occasion of my third birthday. I can't help saying that I look absolutely adorable.

Perusing through my photo album to resurrect shots of the past for this season of blogging has caused me to become nostalgic at times. Wondering how I was in the younger years because I, simply, don't remember.

With the help of my mother's exceptional memory, I've gained incredible insight to the simpler times of this easy going girl's life. Some of those memories being quite heart warming.

For instance, it wasn't the easiest for Mom to get pregnant but when she did with me, there was no morning sickness or exhaustion - quite the opposite. She had tremendous energy and felt really good for the entirety of her term.

When I was ready to make my appearance to the world, fifteen and a half painful hours passed before I popped out and demonstrated the power of my lungs. The doctor even commented on the voraciousness of my screams that wouldn't relent until I was tightly swaddled and given a bottle.

Though my Dad wasn't present for my birth - because of working hard to put food on the table - he did go home after his night shift ended, cleaned up, and came to the hospital to meet me in suit and tie. Impressive.

She also mentioned that while they didn't have an official first name picked out until I met my sistie for the first time, there was a desire to give homage to my Dad. So, his first name, Ray, became my middle name, Rae.

And, therefore, with a favorable set of lungs and clean bill of health, the introduction to my parents went off without a hitch. Their dream of a healthy baby girl was secured and life became a party of four.

Their hearts were full of gratitude to God for blessing them with another babe to adore and raise. There's nothing greater than the circle of family.

Encouragement for the week:

Sweet girl, you are the apple of your parent's eyes. Their hopes and dreams for your life are many and promising.

If you are a Christian reading this, you know that you were created by a God who has great things in store for you. Don't ever doubt that. Live and move in all of His eternal promises.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. Whether you believe it or not, God has incredible things planned for you. You can experience it all in choosing a relationship with Jesus today.

Times Two

**From left to right: Mom, my sistie, my grandma. Not sure who the two little ones are.**

At some point within each young girl's heart, it leaps with excitement at the thought of a birthday party being held just for her. I'm not sure where I was when the above pic was snapped, but it's obvious that there are plans for a party - my second birthday party, to be exact.

Balloons were blown, gifts were being wrapped, and hats were donned in preparation for yours truly to appear. Perhaps, as the frenzy was fierce in the kitchen, I was partaking in one of my favorite past times - napping.

Whatever the case may be, when it was time for the fun to take place, I was put in my chair as the cake was being presented. It was a chocolate cake my mother had made and that my dad placed in front of me.

I hesitated as the frosted treat sat there, waiting for some kind of reaction from me to dive in. That wasn't the case and I'm not sure why because I would never pass up chocolaty goodness like that today.

So without further hesitation, my dad cut a piece of the delectable dessert and placed it on my tray. Still no reaction or movement from me. I'm sure by that time, certain onlookers were hoping to capture a photo of something, anything, but I didn't budge.

So, left to his own devices, dad took a handful of cake and smeared it all over my face which brought an unimpressed look from me, as recalled to me by mom, but a moment that would be captured on film, forever.

The festivities ended with a special musical performance by my grandfather playing his banjo. I was so enthralled by the speed at which his fingers moved that I didn't even sit down to take it all in.

My cherished connection with him was made sweeter as he picked me up, placed me on his lap, put the banjo pick in my fingers and helped me strum on the strings of the treasured instrument. I was in my glory and I'm confident that my heart was full in those moments.

A little girl's life can be fundamentally changed by those who are closest to her, showing love and security. It's why this girl is thankful to God for having all the moments I did with family, my grandfather and his banjo.

Encouragement for the week:

My girl, you are the shine in the eyes of your loved ones, even when cake and frosting have been smeared on your face. You are beloved.

If you are a Christian reading this, those cherished memories of times gone by and loved ones in attendance for the things that really matter, relationship is what God had in mind for us. May we always hold to that.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. The extraordinary relationships you have in your life are no comparison to the awesome relationship Jesus longs to have with you. Sweet girl, you can trust Jesus to be your closest friend.

Get Your Dance On!

Aside from subjecting our family cats to dance lessons, my sistie and I used to host dance parties. Granted, we were the only two at these events, but we would dance for hours and it was a blast.

Our underground palace consisted of the colorful rumpus room and a stack of our favorite vinyl, played on the massive home stereo. We were in our jive element and nothing kept us from bustin' out 'the moves'.

Whether it was the beat of Michael Jackson's 'Thriller', or the smooth sounds of The Bee Gees' 'Saturday Night Fever', we got lost in the thump of the blasting music. Dancing fixed everything that seemed to be lacking in our lives at the time.

Sometimes, I feel that way today. In fact, one day last week had me standing at a photocopier doing the same mundane task I had been doing for weeks. The only difference being, one of my favorite songs from the eighties came on the radio.

Next thing I knew, my head was bobbing and my lips syncing to the familiar tune. I so, desperately, wanted to bust out in dance but considered the consequences of living down a public diss and decided against doing so.

It's incredible how impactful music can be. Simply putting together a sequence of notes, played by specific instruments, can lend to an external freedom of expression brought on by an inner explosion of emotion.

Dancing and music have been around a long time, with no sign of fading out. In fact, music and dancing date back to biblical times. Yes, you read correctly and it delights me to know that dancing and music were embraced, even back then.

The people who played music were key individuals. Many of them playing ahead of armies going to battle. Playing music on the way to fighting an enemy was considered a form of praise to God for a victory not yet obtained.

Seems a bit unorthodox but there is a book in the Bible, which is the Word of God, called Joshua. Joshua was a prophet called by God to take down a city called Jericho. How on earth would that happen?

Well, with one small group of people marching around Jericho and the playing of a single trumpet, this unsuspecting clan shouted after the trumpet played, and the walls came down. Talk about the power of music!

God loves an uplifting tune. He created it, after all, by creating us. Singing, dancing and making music in the right context lightens the heart, brings joy to others, and fills the air with a sweetness that will leave a smile on anyone's face. So, get your dance on.

Encouragement for the week:

If you're a bit down and out, sometimes the right song can make all the difference.

If you are a Christian reading this, you know that God enjoys a good ditty. He especially loves to hear us praise Him through song and music. Take some time to listen to and jive with your favorite uplifting song.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. He can also be found in the sweetest of music that soothes your hurting heart. Sweet girl, you can open your heart to Jesus today.

Vice Grip

Have you ever tried to hold several objects in your hands at once? You can't. You, eventually, have to let go of one or more things to keep another. You might guess that from the above picture, my senses were overloaded with Easter treats and it was hard to choose just a couple to grasp and, soon, eat. Perhaps my sister was trying to help me take more chocolate goodness into my fingers.

Chances are, she may have been taking a treat for herself because she saw it and had to have it. The want for something that isn't ours can create extreme emotion and the resistance to turn away until it's in our possession.

And, sometimes, we have a tendency to hold on to things too long, thinking they will bring the greatest joy or satisfaction to our lives. Things like a negative relationship, without respect or kindness, that robs us of healthy self-esteem and self-worth, all in an effort to avoid being alone. Or staying at a high paying job even though it might compromise our own ethics, values, and beliefs.

Whatever the justification we present, the good things we think are good and take a firm grasp of, may not be good at all. In my life, I have held on to a lot of harmful behaviors, addictions, and abusive relationships, in hopes they were the very best life had to offer. I didn't really know anything different and my perspective on what was deemed 'healthy' was completely skewed.

I would enter into a 'relationship' with a guy thinking it was a place of security, love, and respect. However, because I didn't feel those things for myself, they never manifested themselves in any relationship I engaged in prior to coming into a relationship with God. In fact, I would manipulate every relationship I had in order to get out of it what I wanted, which only resulted in heartache.

The associations I held back then had no real connection and lacked every sign of being positive and uplifting. Yet, it's how I viewed myself that brought about my poor interrelations. As each year passed in a span of fifteen years, my self-portrait looked more and more deformed and without any detectable beauty.

Until I met him. He came into my life at a time when I was most broken, devastated, hurt, and vulnerable. He never used those things to his advantage. He never made me feel ashamed for the life I had been living and he never allowed me to degrade myself. He received me as I was, fully flawed, fully imperfect, and he began an intense transformation.

He, being God, accepted me as his own and never let go even though I doubted how anyone could have loved me as he did. Granted, my vice grip on the things in my life didn't relax for many years even as God was working in my heart to heal me, fix my broken heart and messed up perspective.

However, as he kept on telling me, through his word, the Bible, how much I was truly cherished and beloved, it did begin to erase the recording that had been playing in my brain by my own self-defeating thoughts. Not only did my attitude soften but I began to dream about what my life could look like now that I had been given a new beginning - wiping my past slate clean.

While my priorities were still a bit off as a new creation in Christ - money, possessions, marriage - I was coming into a knowledge of something far better. That something was realizing that God didn't just want good things for me, He had the very best in mind for this daughter that he saved. I didn't appreciate that reality until a couple years ago when my heart continued to be changed and what I wanted started to matter less and less.

For once, it wasn't all about me. It wasn't even about what God might want for me. It was all about him and wanting God's best for my life, whatever that looked like. Whether it meant wealth or not, material items or not, or even if it meant marriage or not. As each day passes, being a follower of Christ, I only want the best and anything less, just won't do.

I have been able to release the clench of my fists long enough to allow those things I long for, to fall into the hands of God. I trust him with every single thing in my life and when it comes to the desires of my heart and wanting to honor God with my life, I know the best is yet to come.

Encouragement for the week:

If you think you are holding on to something that is good, you could be missing out on something far superior and spectacular.

If you are a Christian reading this, you know that God only wants the very best for you and your life. You can trust him with the details of that life, no matter what. Keep him as your focus and be sure to spend time with him each day. In developing that intimacy with your Creator, you won't go wrong in waiting for his absolute best.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find him. The things in your life that bring you heartache and disappointment are not what's best for you, even if you think it is. You can trust the man who died for you to know what's best. Open your heart to a relationship with him, today.

Here, Kitty Kitty!

Have you ever tried to tame a stray cat? No matter what you attempted, even bribing it with food, it came close but never embraced your efforts. It never showed trust on a deep level or saw your kind face as a safe place. Perhaps, its distance was due to the feline being neglected or abused.

Sometimes, we can become stray cats as we live out life and experience unexpected hurt. At times, the hurt incurred may have been unintentional and other times, harshly directed and malicious. The wound that can scar us the most can also come from those closest to us. Whatever the case may be, damage is done and it can cause us to become distant and suspicious of even the slightest human contact.

We may, no longer, feel as though we can share our true selves with anyone or have deep and meaningful relationships due to the fear of being hurt again. Some scars are so deep and excruciating that it can prevent us from living a life filled with laughter, joy, and hope. Yet, while suffering in this life might be inevitable, it doesn't have power over us. The agony and discomfort of negative life experiences can be overcome with the right tools and careful healing.

For me, it was time in counselling and the diligent support and safety of family that helped me come out of my abuse as a young girl. That I felt like I could live without fear to a certain extent and take some enjoyment in life. I'm sure it wasn't easy getting there and I remember never liking school, but I didn't allow that time in my life to keep a grip on me as I tell you about it today.

Now, as an adult woman, the distresses of life, while disheartening and still uncomfortable as they may be, can be disposed of more quickly because of the relationship I have with God. He has demonstrated His power and promises of the Bible in my life time and again. He has brought me full healing from the things of my past and present that cause pain.

It was the invitation of Jesus that had me know that no matter what I was encountering, there was always rest and recovery in His presence and through reading the words He spoke within the Bible. It was one such promise in the book of Matthew, in particular, that brought and still brings a great assurance and relief when I take hold of and remember it in times of struggle or trouble. It says, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." (11:28)

It's an extraordinary promise that calms even the tumultuous of storms that might be raging against me at any given time. I can actually exhale with confidence as I relax my stressed mind and muscles, waiting for the calm that comes from reading the above verse. Soon, the anxiety melts away and I can turn back my focus to lighter things and look forward to someone greater, taking care of things on my behalf as I simply be.

The same holds for you, sweet girl, if you enter into a life changing relationship with Jesus, the Son of God. While He does make things clear over time, He also never hesitates to help us when we call on Him and His heavenly Father. It's just one of His many promises available to us as His beloved. You can have confidence, healing and victory over the dark things of your life, just as I did.

Encouragement for the week:

If life has you feeling like a stray cat, without true meaning or sense of belonging, you are not alone my friend. I have been where you are and I understand.

If you are a Christian reading this, you have come through great hardships and mind altering struggles because of the power and promises of God. It has been as a result of the close relationship you have forged with Him. No matter what, don't turn away from His goodness and love. Take a break in His comforting stillness and sovereign protection.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. His heart for you beats with a longing that will keep Him in pursuit of you until you open your heart and life to Him. True goodness, mercy, and grace are awaiting you in His loving arms. You can trust Him.

The Injustice League

The bewildered look on my face may have something to do with sitting on the lap of someone I wasn't familiar with. I'm guessing that there may have been a handful of awkward moments before returning to my mother's arms.

The labyrinth of life can be a series of peculiar minutes and uncertain situations. As I look into the eyes of myself in the above picture, I consider how such a small life could have ever experienced a peculiarity like injustice.

Our world has become a succession of appalling and horrendous events perpetuated by broken people. At some point within their lives, they saw a crime as being the only way of righting the wrong that may have happened to them.

Perhaps, that is what went through the mind of my abuser as he carried out his plan against me. While it was out in the open at my school's playground, I'm sure my only thought was to enjoy recess that day, as any kindergarten aged child should.

Yet, as it happened, there was no caped crusader to swoop in and save me from the clutches of those participating in the offense. The fallout of that day had me fearful of going to school.

We have all experienced some kind of injustice that leaves a stain on our conscience. When we believe the actions of others should be held accountable and our flesh cries out for them to 'get theirs'.

While I may still have those thoughts from time to time, especially when I see a loved one in the throws of injustice, I also know someone who sees and knows every wrong doing and will make things right.

That someone is God. He promises to act on our behalf if we say we trust Him for the outcome and I do. One example of that promise found in the Bible is within the book of Exodus 14:14, which says, "The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still". That brings relief to my soul and a reassurance to my life.

I can take the above words not only as truth, but speak them to those who are struggling within their own unfathomable situation, to encourage and uplift. That as unjust as the circumstances may be, no good can come from issuing retaliation on the injustice league they face.

So, I fix my eyes on God who can bring proper justice because He never rests until his children are secure in his promises for their lives; they're made new by his healing touch on their hearts and bodies; and they're stronger in his presence to come through a difficult time without taking the law into their own hands.

My most admired example of strength in the face of corruption is Jesus. There are several times in the Bible when Jesus, the son of God, has accusations hurled at him, to which he doesn't defend himself on. Jesus' silence was deafening to his fault finders right up to the Cross, where Jesus was crucified.

The people who put Him there thought it was over but Jesus shocked them in saying, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." (Luke 23:34) Not only did Jesus suffer for all, but he sought forgiveness for those who had no remorse for the punishment they inflicted on the Savior. He is an example of how I wish to be whenever wronged because the forgiveness of injustice, and those who perpetuate it, sets us free and allows us, the accused, to heal and live a life of abundance.

I need to trust God to make things right in my life and those I love - not take matters into my own hands and create a scenario holding irreversible consequences. You, sweet girl, can do the same.

Encouragement for the week:

Personal justice might be on your mind for a wrong doing, but it will only lead to greater heartache in your life. Believe me, I know.

If you are a Christian reading this, you know the key to justice lies in your God because He promises to fight life's battles on your behalf. Continue to trust Him for the outcome of your unjust situation and see what He will do.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. He's not only a God of love but He is also one of justice. He sees the wrongs you have had to endure and He can make things right if you accept him into your life and trust him for the results.

Walk This Way

This is me at Easter of 1973, three months shy of my first birthday. I think it's safe to say that the startled look on my face is due to the unexpected camera flash as opposed to fear.

Back then I didn't believe in much except that Mom would hold on to me so as not to fall on my keister. Also, that wherever I was headed, it was the intended direction to walk. While part of walking meant falling down, it also meant getting help to stand and keep going.

Though walking the road of abuse and self-hatred was never part of a desired journey as a young girl, I believe today, that it was a path I was meant to take. Whether good or bad, all our roads lead to some kind of destination.

When we affirm strongly enough in something, a deep conviction takes root that helps move us toward a better destination which is where I find myself these days. Not necessarily being on an easy road but knowing the difficult parts will work together for a fantastic end point.

There are specific details about my life that serve as inalienable and immovable. That is, I will not cave to external pressures in order to appease internal discomfort. It's taken a while but when I come to believe in something, I believe it and there is no going back.

Learning to walk was a milestone for me as an infant. Walking in the calling I, firmly, believe God has for me right now is, admittedly, a nail biter. Yet, everything I am says to not be afraid and just take the next step.

It's not that I am stuck in the past and unable to break free as I share it. On the contrary. It is because of God's truth that I have been set free in order to use the former to help young and mature women walk in a different direction.

One that means healing and wholeness. And not only would I have serious regrets that I didn't use what I endured to help someone, but I would be even more remiss in failing to share the reason for my jail break. So, I'm walking day by day, step by step, to a predetermined destination that, while unknown to me, is of no surprise to my God.

In fact, God says in His Word, within the pages of the book of Isaiah, "Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying, "This is the way; walk in it."" - Isaiah 30:21. Though I might have apprehension in going ahead, I know I'm in the hands of someone who works all things for good.

Encouragement for the week:

Perhaps, you're looking to walk a certain road that makes you uneasy but your convictions say to continue, no matter what. Stay true to the road, knowing the destination's glory will far outweigh the difficulty of the trip.

If you are a Christian reading this, you know God has a calling on your life.  While you may not fully know what that is yet, be assured that He will give you the conviction and strength to carry it out for His glory.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. He has a beautiful plan for your mess of a life right now. You can trust Him to see things through and bring healing along the way.

I Vant To Be Alone

My home growing up was a busy one. The ladies in the picture above, with myself and my sister, were part of a care home my Mom headed in our house.

Aside from my parents being nurses, they both had hearts of compassion, care and love for others. While Dad worked a traditional nursing position in a local hospital, my Mom had a desire for tending to mentally handicapped men and women who occupied our residence.

So, there was never a shortage of activity. For years, I would have meals with them and, when the weather lent, threw horseshoes into pits during back yard picnics. They all became a larger part of our family.

Suffice it to say, there were occasions when I needed time to myself, away from the action. To be alone so that I could rest before the next set of meals and games. Not much has changed since then.

While I love people, I still require time away from folks so that I may be recharged and refreshed. Being an extroverted introvert means there is a limit to my exchanges with people before quiet rest is a must.

There's nothing wrong with that and I am not weird for being that way. In fact, one of my favorite persons of the Bible frequently left crowds to spend time alone. That person was Jesus.

He, often, stole away from the demanding hoards in order to seek time and interaction with his heavenly Father. He would get into a boat, sailing to the opposite side of a lake or get up very early in the morning, just to be by himself.

I love the fact Jesus did that because if He needed a break from the people He greatly loved, that means it's okay for me to need some quiet time. It means that after some solitude with God and prayers in between, I'm able to serve others more effectively, just like Jesus.

So don't feel guilty, sweet girl, for taking a break from people in order to get some down time. There is a place in each of our hearts that God created to long for quiet time with Him.

Breathe in deeply, take steps slowly, and enjoy the stillness that surrounds you during those times of isolation.

Encouragement for the week:

Taking a time out isn't just for kids. You can't expect to be everything to everyone at all times. Steal away from the crowds, just like Jesus did, and you will find rejuvenation.

If you are a Christian reading this, you have an innate need for stillness. The next time you find yourself in noisy surroundings, take a break with God. He'll energize you so that you can rejoin the masses.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. He longs to have you to Himself and recharge you for whatever lies ahead in your life.

What's In A Song?

**Photography by Melissa Talbot**

Have you ever been driving to a destination and your favorite song comes on? You turn it up and even though you have heard the tune many times, this particular time on this particular day is...extraordinary.

Yes, the words are the same as the last time it was played but they, inexplicably, pierce your indifferent heart. That's exactly what happened to me last week as I drove to work one morning.

The said ditty spoke about the reckless love of God. How God pursues and fights for those He loves - you and I. I was struck with the truth, in a split second, that God fought for me. I began to weep.

If it were not for God placing a certain person in my life to tell me about Jesus, to break down the walls built around my cold, dark heart - I would be dead. If it were not for God thwarting every single suicide attempt I had planned so long ago - this blog would not exist to encourage you that there is more.

Sweet girl, if you find your road is long and overwhelming, you need to know someone is in pursuit of you and He will not stop until He drowns you in His love.

God has a reckless love for you that means He will enter into whatever hell you find yourself in and He will not stop until you see Him and welcome Him.

He will break down every lie. He will tear apart every abusive word spoken to and about you. He will go to the ends of this earth to have you as His own. That is the awesome God that I know and love.

He pursued me and won me when I no longer saw myself as worthwhile to be pursued. Let me tell you this truth - you are priceless. A Man named Jesus died on the Cross because you are valuable. He loved you more than His own life so that you could be free.

That is the purest love you will never find in an earthly man, chat room, or Netflix binge watch. "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him." - John 3: 16-17

Encouragement for the week:

If you are a Christian reading this, continue to live in the truth that God pursued you with a reckless love. Be in awe and thank Him for rescuing you.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. He died for you and will pursue you no matter what. Love is after you. Real and pure love that you have never known. It's worth opening your heart to it.

Jumping Through Hoops

What does frozen fish head hockey, chicken salad, and cow tongue tag have in common? Nothing. I just wanted to see if you were paying attention. It worked, didn't it?

Being young and free, like I was in the above picture, pales in comparison to anything else. As you can see from the look on my face, I took a certain amount of joy from jumping. It didn't matter that I wasn't getting anywhere, it was just fun.

I could jump as high, often, or crazily as I wanted - as long as I stayed in the middle of the doorway. Provided I was kept entertained by this simple invention, life was good and, I'm guessing, Mom would be grateful to get some things done.

While I may not remember those days of bouncing with glee while attached to the stationary contraption, just looking at the photo speaks for itself, or more appropriately, myself. There was no coercion involved, just pure fun.

Wouldn't we always like to be in a situation like that. Doing something while never being told you had to do it. Moreover, never having to be manipulated or threatened into doing it.

Sadly, there are those in the world who, through no fault of their own, are manipulated into doing things - horrible things. They are even threatened to go along with a scenario, or suffer serious consequences.

In a past post, I mentioned that I had been abused. While I knew the offender, it wasn't that easy to report him. Though the crime was played out in public, a threat involving my mother's life guaranteed my silence and time went on.

That was wrong. What happened to me was wrong and it took a long time to get through the worst of the event. I was petrified to go to school and even more so to ride on the bus that took me there. Even though the criminal lived nearby, I was able to move on and heal. Yet, to this day, I wish I had the courage to lay the justice smack down on my abuser.

Intimidation and threats have no place in a young girl's life. She should have the opportunity to be heard and protected at any cost by those around her, no matter what.

Encouragement for the week:

Jumping through hoops for someone else's gain is really no gain at all. Live a life of joy, sweet girl, and always exercise caution when being approached by someone who doesn't have a mindset of protection or respect for you.

If you are a Christian reading this, you know that God is your protector and strong tower in every situation. Be cautious and wise when being met with a, possibly, threatening or manipulative situation.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. He is a fortress and protection from all things, menacing, that can appear in your life. You can trust this Man who died for you to help in every uncertain situation in your life.

A Brief Departure

Last week was a departure from the everyday as I stepped into a role that excites me - speaker. One had cancelled at Gull Lake camp and I was asked if I could fill in. I was elated to accept.

I knew I would have to set a precedent for the week in order to get and hold my audience's attention - 7 to 10 years old. It was within 24 hours that I became the, 'lady with the smarties'. Hey, you gotta do what you gotta do.

I would be under-selling my success by saying they just liked it. Instead, I had captured the enthusiasm and willingness of a young group which I thought would be difficult to harness. Nothing could be farther from the truth.

The jumping up and down motion followed by the occasional, "Pick me! Pick me!" was a clear giveaway that the kids were more than happy to be there. By Wednesday morning, I had already received a random hug from a little boy and buckets of smiles to fill my own bucket.

My heart was filling up with love faster than I knew what to do with that love. So, I smiled back, gave high fives, and engaged in all kinds of conversations that only a 7 to 10 year old would appreciate.

By Thursday, I was getting a bit nervous, because even though I had been presenting object lessons in line with my teachings (the fruit of the Spirit) and getting kids to read the paired Scripture, I had never revealed the telling of the Gospel through a visual picture story.

Yet, the desire to tell these children about the incredible man of Jesus, blew every nervous cell clear out of me, being replaced by excitement. My moment came. I began with a fun activity that had everyone reciting the fruit of the Spirit and their respective hand signals, with three precocious volunteers leading the charge. Their reward for participating? You guessed it - smarties.

On to the story board. I wanted the message to penetrate deeply into each heart, whether Christian or not, so I spoke slowly and deliberately. At some points came comments of disbelief to what I was saying. I thanked God for the response.

By the time I was done, it felt as though forever had passed and I closed with an invitation for anyone to receive Jesus by praying the salvation prayer - whether out loud or in their hearts. I never thought any more about it until I closed the session.

Little ones came to me. Most of them little girls. One saying she knew Jesus and others just wanting a hug. However, the tone of the interactions changed with two particular girls. I have changed their names due to not securing their parent's permission prior to sharing this. Sally came first.  She walked confidently up to me and said, "I prayed the prayer!", while a glowing smile now adorned her face. I shook her hand and welcomed her to the family, followed by a hug.

Jane came next and she had a concerned look on her face. She said that she had a 'trouble' and was wondering if I might be able to help her with it. "Of course!", I replied. She continued, saying,"If I'm to pray with all my heart, how do I know I have?"

I asked her if she meant every word she said of the prayer and after a couple seconds she confirmed, "I think so." I told her that she now had Jesus in her heart. Words could not describe the relief now painted all over her face as she smiled, excitedly, and threw her arms around me in the best hug I have ever received. As she hugged me she said,"Thank you!"

I then prayed that she would quickly leave the building, which she did. I held it together for a few seconds before falling to pieces. Every doubt I had of my ability as a speaker last week, every second guess I displayed about my material, all erased as I watched a sweet little girl bound out of the chapel having Jesus firmly planted in her heart. Each incompetency I had listed about myself earlier in the week - gone.

I had just witnessed the movement of a perfect and loving God in a precious young girl, through the power of the Holy Spirit. I could have died right then, on the cold and dirty floor of that chapel, knowing absolute perfection.

Encouragement for the week:

If you ever question your abilities, stop right now, because there are moments in time, that you least expect, will set your heart on a new trajectory. Do whatever it is you're doing with all your heart's love, expecting nothing in return. You may just taste perfection.

If you are a Christian reading this, God has given us each gifts and talents He desires us to implement for His glory. Never underestimate the power of obedience in executing those gifts and talents.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. He can do anything, at any time, in anyone. If you think He doesn't know where you're at, think again and leave the door of your heart unlocked and ajar.

Monkey See, Monkey Do

Ah, my sistie. She was my idol. I would follow her around, doing the things she did and saying the things she said. She had a significant 'influence' on me growing up.

I wanted to be everywhere she was because I wanted to be like her. Sometimes when other people know how much you adore them, there is the possibility that they will use that knowledge to their advantage and your detriment.

While my loyalty may have been tested by way of cat food and peanut butter (not together), there came a time when my sister's influence wore off and I became a separate entity.

There is an intrinsic truth to doing unto others what you would have done unto you. Yet, when it comes to the early years as siblings, that truth can't and won't be appreciated or exercised until much later. Until then, parents brace themselves for what their little girls may say or do to each other.

Today, I definitely take that truth, above, to heart and display it as much as possible. Nowadays, the only ammo my sister sprays me with are words of encouragement and inspiration.

I have seen her go through a lot of struggles in her life and come out the other side as a kind, loving, and compassionate human being. She endeavors to make things right when a wrong has been committed and she would give her life for her kids.

I may have wanted to get even with her countless times, growing up, for all the things she manipulated me to do but that has faded with the passing years.

The only thing this monkey wants is see the best in others, treat them with respect, and do my utmost for God's highest. To ensure others know they are loved and monkey around whenever possible. Life is too short not to.

If you find you're doing more battle than beauty in your life, stop and take a break, sweet girl. You might have a relentless sibling you deal with who tries to persuade your ways but don't let it get you down.

Love them as you endeavor to be the right person who will come out ahead as a girl who is on track to be of great and positive influence to others.

Encouragement for the week:

Living a young life beside siblings isn't easy especially if you are receiving some heavy stuff. Know that you are loved in the midst of it all by a perfect God who sees you for who you truly are - beautiful.

If you are a Christian reading this, you know that God has your name engraved on the palm of His hand. There's no way for it to leave. Walk in the light of that truth and continue to do unto others as you would have done unto you.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. He sees your difficulties in life and waits, patiently, at the door of your heart. Be not afraid to open the door and let Him in.

In The Grand Scheme Of Things

I've been told that there is nothing quite like becoming a grandparent. While I'm still awaiting the bliss of that, I often get drawn back to the memories of my own grandparents. That's a picture of my Mom's parents, holding me and my sister.

They were the best. I was the closest to my grandfather and he used to tell me that I was his favorite. I bathed in that truth and took it to heart. He had become the center of my world and I loved him dearly.

I felt the most special when I was with him and because he lived far from me, we spent as much time together as possible. During summer break from school, my sister and I would spend time with our grandparents. Sometimes it meant going fishing which included my privileged time of steering the boat. I felt like I was on top of the world.

When he was diagnosed with cancer, I was devastated and panic stricken. I couldn't imagine my life without him. It was one of their trips back from Arizona that they told us of the news. In their retirement years, they spent the winters in Yuma, Arizona. I, often, wanted to go with them.

I don't remember a lot about grandpa's sickness except it stole all the things that made him who he was to me. When he got really bad, we took him into our home and cared for him. That was an exceptionally cherished time for me.

Whenever I wanted to see him, I could. When the cancer got really bad, he could no longer talk. That was really hard to take but it seemed as though I could look into his deep, blue eyes and just know what he was saying to me.

Then, what seemed like in the blink of an eye, he passed away. Shortly before then, he had been transferred to a hospital because we could no longer provide the critical care he needed. I always hoped that he would get better. I mean, what little girl wouldn't hope for that? He was Superman to me and I thought he would fully recover and come knocking on my door. That never happened.

I was so distraught at his passing that I didn't even cry at his funeral. To this day, my sister marvels at how I could have done that. It seems cruel that I didn't but I was beyond tears.

My grandfather was gone - my world was over as far as I knew it. Even as I write this out, I can feel the hurt of losing him all over again. How surreal.

We are never fully prepared to lose a loved one, especially one so close to our hearts. It can devastate our lives and leave us baffled. I was far from being consoled when my grandfather left this world.

I wasn't sure how I would go forward. I truly believe that something changed in me that day to lend to altering the trajectory of my life. Don't ask me how, it just seemed to happen. Things...I just wasn't the same as the years wore on. I became an angry, despondent, and depressed girl.

It's taken a long time, but I finally came to terms with my grandfather's passing and because of having a relationship with God, I believe that I will see him again in heaven. I have learned that in order to get through the grieving process, you first have to give yourself permission to grieve.

I didn't do that as a young girl. Losing someone close can take a long time to overcome. Especially, if that person didn't have a relationship with Jesus. However, I believe that every single person has an opportunity to know the love and goodness of God, not only at any point of their lives but also at the end of it.

I have known God long enough to know that He never gives up on anyone and He will pursue each person who doesn't know Him, in hopes that they will invite Him into their hearts and lives to have an abundant life in Him. That was my hope for my grandfather and is for each person, including you, sweet girl.

Encouragement for the week:

Losing someone close to you isn't easy. Especially, when you have special memories of your time with that person. I understand.

If you are a Christian reading this, you know that there is great comfort and peace in going to Jesus at times of loss. His arms bring rest and assurance, even in the most unsettling of times. Keep running to Him.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. He has the power and love to walk with you through every loss in your life while bringing you peace and comfort beyond your own understanding.

The Cake And I

Me, my birthday cake, and the Hiawatha flyer. Perfection. After having just celebrated another birthday, recently, it's interesting how my perspective about life has changed.

Of course I know that as time passes, I'm getting older, not younger. That realization alone could be depressing but I have chosen to take a different stance. I'm recognizing so many other things.

The little nuances of life that I experienced as that baby girl were lost on me for obvious reasons. I was young, immature, and inexperienced in the issues of life. That's true for everyone.

What makes the difference as a mature woman, and maturing more every year, is that I'm taking notice of the smaller things rather than the bigger because it's the snapshot moments that make the collage.

I have even made a practice of taking the week prior to my birthday and securing inventory of my life from the previous year. Have I changed? Has my life become what I thought it would?

I think we can all admit that life doesn't always take us where we want to go but, then again, did we really know where that was in the first place?

It's reflecting on the past that causes the greatest introspection because, somehow, my life became a train wreck back then with cars of depression, self-destruction, self-hatred, and addictions strewn along the tracks.

While I have been saved from all that by the grace of God, I can't help but think of how many women, like my former self, are still out there. It's a saddening point of contention for me.

Yet, it's that empathy for the hurting girls and women out there that insist I live with intent and compassion. That I reach out when I can to be a hearing ear and a holding hand.

It's to be aware and ready to seize those moments in life that seem small but actually yield the biggest results. Like sitting on a blanket in a park and enjoying a piece of red velvet cake while being surrounded by loved ones.

Like looking into the eyes of a scared girl and telling her it will be okay. That she's not alone, she matters and is loved.

May each of my birthdays be much more than just about me. May you know that you were meant to be a strong and confident young woman, with no concern for the world's opinions.

Encouragement for the week:

Though birthdays come and go, may you recognize the precious meaning behind your special day. You are not a mistake, my sweet girl.

If you are a Christian reading this, you already know that God chose you to bless the world with your birth. Don't let that incredible truth be lost. Celebrate it!

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. He created and chose you for such a time as this. He is waiting for you to ask Him into your heart and life so that you can know the truth of your beauty as His daughter.

Do I Have Something On My Face?

Yes, even back then I was a connoisseur of all things food. I, carefully, examined all the delicacies that met my mouth with scrutiny and the utmost of etiquette. Okay, who are we kidding...I loved food and wore it because it was that good. Not much has changed since then.

I'm not quite sure what it was that I had decimated in that picture, but by the smile on my face, I think it was mighty good. Whether it was a main dish or dessert, that hair plugged infant enjoyed every minute of what she was experiencing. No, I didn't have actual hair plugs but by the light of the camera flash, I look like a very young Albert Einstein in a moment of frenzy.

Often, food can become a comfort when the rest of the world seems to let you down. It can soothe you when your'e grumpy and lift your spirits when you're sad. Grub can be a powerful 'fix all' to the life stuff we perceive to be a bother to us. Some of my comfort foods include spaghetti or a bag of my favorite chips.

Whatever the go-to fare might be, there's just something about chocolate cake for dinner that makes the world go away. In some ways, I wish my addiction was with food and not what they turned out to be - alcohol and sex. Albeit, if there was a choice to be made, no addictions would have been ideal.

Within the, already, complex design of life, addictions are the last things we have in mind. At least, it was for me. I really thought, with stern determination, that my life would be much different than it had become and without any of the sticky webs that can get in the way. Like lack of self-esteem, being rejected, and self-hatred.

You and I were never meant to battle through life like we do but I also wasn't counting on things turning out the way they did growing up. Being an infant was easier, as much as I recall. I was constantly protected because I needed to be carried and looked after, closely. I had to be within arms, eyes, and ears reach of my parents and that was good.

There are just some things that we were not intended to experience or go through but, somehow, we did and those things hurt us...changed us. While we may ponder addictions, in whatever form, to be harmless, they really aren't. Some can be devastating with life long, adverse, effects or life ending consequences. No matter what, we were created for so much more.

The stark contrast between my life now and decades ago, is like a deep draw of fresh air. I can't imagine where I would be if I had continued on my former path of self-destruction. Well, okay, I do know where I would be - six feet under.

So, as much as you think you are a mistake or the self-deprecating things you're doing now won't have long lasting and life changing effects, you are mistaken on both counts. You mean more than you know. You are loved more deeply than you could ever fathom and it is by someone you may not have considered before because no one ever told you about him. He is the reason I am alive today and have fully recovered from the addictions that once haunted me.

So, while I may have that piece of chocolate cake for dinner, once in a while, with remnants showing all over my face, I know that because I stopped long enough to be known and loved by God, that it is why I inhale deeply today. It is my intense experience and close relationship with God that gives me that sigh of relief that says, "I am not the same girl I once was". For that, comes immense gratitude.

Encouragement for the week:

My friend and sweet girl, if there is something in your life that seems to bring you down more than lift you up, it wasn't meant to be a part of your life. Struggles are real, but they don't have to rule you.

If you are a Christian reading this, you know that you were meant for more when you said, "Yes!" to a relationship with Jesus Christ. He has great things in store for you no matter what you are facing, and He can help you overcome all the things that feel overwhelming right now. Call out to God while you keep trusting and obeying Him. You can believe that good will come from the struggle.

If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. He knows what you are going through. He sees the things you are struggling to get rid of in your life. You don't have to wait to have your life sorted out to come to Him. He will help you overcome everything that is hurting you.