This is me at Easter of 1973, three months shy of my first birthday. I think it's safe to say that the startled look on my face is due to the unexpected camera flash as opposed to fear.
Back then I didn't believe in much except that Mom would hold on to me so as not to fall on my keister. Also, that wherever I was headed, it was the intended direction to walk. While part of walking meant falling down, it also meant getting help to stand and keep going.
Though walking the road of abuse and self-hatred was never part of a desired journey as a young girl, I believe today, that it was a path I was meant to take. Whether good or bad, all our roads lead to some kind of destination.
When we affirm strongly enough in something, a deep conviction takes root that helps move us toward a better destination which is where I find myself these days. Not necessarily being on an easy road but knowing the difficult parts will work together for a fantastic end point.
There are specific details about my life that serve as inalienable and immovable. That is, I will not cave to external pressures in order to appease internal discomfort. It's taken a while but when I come to believe in something, I believe it and there is no going back.
Learning to walk was a milestone for me as an infant. Walking in the calling I, firmly, believe God has for me right now is, admittedly, a nail biter. Yet, everything I am says to not be afraid and just take the next step.
It's not that I am stuck in the past and unable to break free as I share it. On the contrary. It is because of God's truth that I have been set free in order to use the former to help young and mature women walk in a different direction.
One that means healing and wholeness. And not only would I have serious regrets that I didn't use what I endured to help someone, but I would be even more remiss in failing to share the reason for my jail break. So, I'm walking day by day, step by step, to a predetermined destination that, while unknown to me, is of no surprise to my God.
In fact, God says in His Word, within the pages of the book of Isaiah, "Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying, "This is the way; walk in it."" - Isaiah 30:21. Though I might have apprehension in going ahead, I know I'm in the hands of someone who works all things for good.
Encouragement for the week:
Perhaps, you're looking to walk a certain road that makes you uneasy but your convictions say to continue, no matter what. Stay true to the road, knowing the destination's glory will far outweigh the difficulty of the trip.
If you are a Christian reading this, you know God has a calling on your life. While you may not fully know what that is yet, be assured that He will give you the conviction and strength to carry it out for His glory.
If you are not a Christian reading this, you can look for Jesus and you will find Him. He has a beautiful plan for your mess of a life right now. You can trust Him to see things through and bring healing along the way.
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