Saturday, January 4, 2014

God's Timing

I don't think I've ever been a fan of God's timing. I know I'm not alone in saying that. As believers who have committed our lives to following God, as much as we desire to do so we often find ourselves wanting things to happen now. I've lost count of how many times I've tried to force, cajole, beg, or bargain with God to go along with my timing. It's never happened. That's a good thing. I think.

Hard to believe it's been over two years since I returned from Costa Rica. Even harder to believe is that what I thought to be God's next and immediate assignment for me has taken this long to come to life again. It was the moment I stepped foot onto Canadian soil again, back in late 2011, that the loudest and clearest word to come from God was, "CUBA." 

I was so excited that in preparing the summary presentation of my Costa Rica trip for my home church and supporters, I included my confident next step on my presentation's last slide. It contained several pictures and the word 'Cuba'. That's how sure I was. 

After giving that presentation, I became poised and ready to jump into action again in spite of not knowing what God's next assignment looked like. Little did I know that there was more training, waiting, and patience involved. Waiting and patience are definitely two words that I'm not good at or fond of. 

Nonetheless, in being prepared to go to Costa Rica, it was inevitable that some preparation would have to be done in me and in my life in order to take the next steps God now has in mind for me. As I sit here typing I can see a snapshot of what God did in my life and in me to prepare me for what's coming in this new year.

They say that hindsight is 20/20. I think it's invaluable. That as I continue to seek a deeper and more intimate relationship with the Creator of the universe, there have been some amazing lessons these past two years that I've come away with. Lessons that have opened my eyes even more to the revelation of God Himself. Here is a list of some marked events and lessons/blessings that emerged from each event.

Event (Jan. 2012): One month after returning from Costa Rica, I'm hired full time to work a well paying job in a small oil and gas company. God then called me out of that position in July 2012.
Lesson/Blessing: Through obeying God's call for me to leave my position, He blessed me by calling me into full time prayer ministry with Him for 5 months.

Event (Feb. 2013): Led to a non-profit organization (HART) to work full time in reception/administration.
Lesson/Blessing: In accepting the position, God blessed me with a promotion prior to the end of my probationary period.

Event (Apr. 2013): Evangelism training for the Billy Graham My Hope Canada project at my home church.
Lesson/Blessing: God preparing my heart and spirit as well as blessing me with a short reunion with former colleagues and friends from the BGEAC.

Event (June 2013): Involved in a car accident, not of my fault, and sustained a minor whiplash and concussion.
Lesson/Blessing: God led me to the clinic that helped me with the pain of my recovery and blessed me with a return to pre-accident status (Dec. 2013) and freedom from some financial burden. He also helped me to make improvements in my life by reducing stress, adjusting my nutrition, and making changes to my existing exercise program. Doing all of these things brought me more wisdom, discernment, and understanding about my body and what it needs to stay well. This has all made me healthier and stronger!

This snapshot brings me to today, January 4, 2014 and the resurrection, as it were, of my blog. A time of sharing with all of you what the next step, Cuba, might look like. As some of you might know, Cuba is still very much a communist based country. Like many places under similar rule, communism tends to be oppressive, manipulative, and controlling with very few 'freedoms' to the people under that rule. 

Cuba is often thought of as a tourist destination with its tropical weather, white sandy beaches, and crystal clear blue water.There is, however, a dark side of immorality, spiritism/cults, and persecution against Christians.

Cuba has a thirst and hunger for the Gospel. A need to know Jesus Christ, not just to know OF Him. A country in need of people who are willing to go and speak the truth of the Gospel and make Jesus known to Cubans. I believe that I am to be one of those persons. I believe that my training in Costa Rica and the events of the past two years have been in preparation for God's reignited call to Cuba as of recent.

Of course seeing Cuba is a communist country, only those who are Cuban citizens can reside there permanently. Foreigners or non-citizens are restricted in their length of stay depending on where you're from. I believe as a Canadian, one could stay there as a tourist for up to 90 days at a time. 

At this point, I don't know what my time looks like in Cuba. I don't know the 'when's' or 'how's' of my start there and for how long God desires me to be connected to Cuba. I only know that most of it involves evangelism. Only God knows the timing and the logistical details. In the meantime, I have begun preliminary inquiries with a couple different people within organizations and am continuing to pray and wait on God for the details to be made known. I know that they will be in His timing.

There will be regular updates to you, my followers, supporters, and fellow prayer warriors. I am  hoping to do updates more often so as to keep them shorter in length. I'll share more as I know more. Until then, please join with me in prayer for the following:

- Please pray that God would continue to feed the fire that burns in my spirit to do His will until such time it becomes God's time for me to go to Cuba.
- Please pray that God would widely and clearly open the right door of opportunity in Cuba for me to enter into.
- Please pray that when the time comes for me to 'GO', that God would provide everything that I will need at that time. Whether it is finances, prayer, or otherwise, may God grant me a trusting heart.

Thank you everyone! 

Sunday, August 12, 2012

It's A Wild Ride

Ever been on a roller coaster? It's exhilarating, scary, and at times challenging (only because you're trying your best not to throw up). Well, following God has presented similarities to that of a roller coaster...at least it has for me.

Since I answered God's call of my name five and a half short years ago, this journey I have been on with Him has been nothing short of a wild roller coaster ride (minus the possibility of throwing up). LOL

I've experienced exhilaration, excitement, fear, doubt, difficulty, peace, and freedom. Yes, freedom. A freedom that I have NEVER experienced ever before in my life and the closer I walk with God, the tighter He holds me and the more free I feel.

I recently experienced a sharp turn on my roller coaster ride with the Lord early last month, July 4 to be exact. It all began with a dream, a prophetic dream from God. It was very vivid and very clear and when I woke up from that dream I just KNEW within my being that it was from God. In fact, as soon as I woke up the outstanding indicator telling me it was from God was the unsurpassing peace I had.

But as humans we kinda look for more, even humans who follow God closely. So, like Gideon, I prayed for the Lord to confirm this message I received from Him in the dream which by the way was a very detailed dream of me resigning from the administrative position I held with a small oil and gas company. The very same position God had brought me eight months earlier.

Having taken the unsurpassing peace I received upon waking from the dream as my first confirmation from the Lord, I prayed for a second confirmation from Him through His Word, His living and infallible Word. It wasn't long after I prayed that prayer that the word 'resignation' appeared in the message of a devotional based on a piece of Scripture from the Word of God.

Feeling more human than normal, I'm guessing, I came to the Lord again, much like Gideon...again, and I prayed for the Lord to confirm it one last time. I prayed that God would confirm His call to me through the Holy Spirit that resided within me. That He would speak loudly, clearly, and deeply to my spirit through the power of the Holy Spirit, telling me that it was, indeed, His will that I resign. That His words would resonate throughout my entire being so much so that it would be impossible to ignore what He was telling me. I was pressing God more than usual because I really didn't want to resign. I REALLY liked my job! I had a fantastic boss and the greatest work environment I could ever hope for!!

Well, it wasn't ten minutes after I had prayed that prayer that my ENTIRE being became filled with one word, 'RESIGN'. Yep, capital letters and all started to resonate in my heart, mind, and spirit. There was no ignoring it or misunderstanding what God was telling me. Yikes! So I swallowed hard and said, "Okay, Lord, that is what I will do." So I continued to pray and then typed my letter of resignation and tendered it to my boss on July 9.

The only thing is that while God was calling me to do this, He wasn't telling me what was coming next and I had never experienced that before in my walk with Him. So, perhaps, you can see why I hesitated and prayed for God to confirm this so many times.

But I did it and my departure, while met with sadness, was also met with excitement for what lay ahead, which I had no idea what that was. My last day was August 3 and this then segued into a week's vacation at one of my favorite B&B spots in Alberta.

Three weeks prior to my last day, however, I was sent to Nova Scotia on business for one week and while there, God blessed me in ways I never anticipated. One such blessing came on the full weekend I had in the province. I decided to travel to the coast and find a little hideaway that would allow me respite along with some time peering out at the Atlantic Ocean. I found such a place on Big Island in Merigomish, Nova Scotia. As I got settled in this B&B I had found, I sat on my bed and peered out of one of the windows in my room. Directly in my line of sight was an apple tree and in moments I saw a picture of myself sitting under that apple tree with Jesus. Not only that but with the picture came one word, 'FREE'. Yes, that word was in capital letters as well. LOL

That brought to my mind the great truths of God's Word that I was free in Christ and in the salvation that I had accepted when I let Him into my heart. Free to be the woman God had saved to be transformed into who He always intended me to be. However, since God spoke that word to me weeks ago, it's been spoken to me every single day since then and I couldn't ignore the fact that I felt as though there was something more to that word. It was during my final week of work that God began to reveal to me the deeper meaning behind the word He gave me in Nova Scotia.

That not only did I have that eternal freedom in Christ but that God was now giving me the freedom to choose...choose what was to come next in my life. The freedom to come before Him and pray for the very longings and desires so deeply held in my heart that I dreamed so many times would come next. The deepest held? Marriage. Others? Relationships...that with my son, my family, my friends. This revelation was a mind blower, I must admit. I had never felt more apprehensive, humbled, and blessed to have received what God was now telling me. This really encompassed everything within the single, solitary word that God had spoken to me, whispered to my heart in His still, small voice in that B&B in that sleepy town of Merigomish, Nova Scotia.

Not only was God pouring out this freedom to choose to me but He was also telling me to do so boldly, fearlessly, and specifically. How can this be?? Can I be trusted with all of this? Would God have spoken all of this to me if He didn't trust me? Was it all a direct result of me trusting in Him all these years? Even with all the questions came the peace, that unsurpassing peace again, like with the dream that started all of this. Bringing to end one chapter of my life and beginning another filled with uncertainty but surely a great freedom that God ordained for me.

After completing my final day of work, I packed up and headed to my B&B vacation in the country where I knew I would find refreshment, blessing, and a closeness with God I couldn't quite get in the city. Each day was a fountain of God's blessings on me including words, songs, Scripture verses, and extraordinary experiences with nature. Prayers were answered daily as God spoke words to me that I had come to know well from Him. Those words being 'FREE', 'WAIT', and 'BLESS'. It was just a wonderful time to be and to enjoy all that God had for me there.

It was much like a walk down memory lane and God was my tour guide. Speaking to me of all the things that He had done in my life and in me in the past year. My time in Costa Rica and the extraordinary life changes that occured during my five months there. The purposes He had revealed to me and all the memories of His daily faithfulness. And I can't leave out the many affirmations, confirmations, and reassurances that He had for me each day. What an incredible week and a symphony I didn't want to stop hearing or experiencing. I can't begin to explain how difficult it was to leave that and make my way back here to city life, but I did it as reluctantly as possible. LOL

After being back a couple days, it's been an adjustment but God has been faithful and has already brought me work! After spending time with a sister in Christ in fellowship and prayer yesterday morning, God began to speak to me the moment I got in my car to leave. The word He initially spoke to me and the message to follow was unmistakable...'Prayer'. God then said to me, "I want you to work for me, to be in prayer for me. I want you to fulfill one of my purposes for you and be the prayer warrior I always intended you to be."

It was hard to miss the excitement that immediately bubbled within my heart and spirit when I heard that. Then the excitement quickly gave way to humility and an awe I had never encountered before. God is calling me to work for Him??! The Creator of the universe is recruiting ME!!!?? Wha??? How could I possibly say no!!??

It's not your typical day job..at least it's not a job which the world recognizes as being one of great value or that it holds in high esteem because you don't get paid to do it. But, for me, the rewards far outweigh the fact that I won't get paid to do what God has called and chosen me to do during this time in my life. In fact, it's directly in line with the freedom God has given me for what comes next in my life.

So, for a time, I will work for the greatest boss in the universe, 24/7 if He wants me to, and sink into the joy and desire of praying that God has set so deeply in my heart not only for myself and for those around me who I know well but for those who I don't know at all but who God loves with a never ending love.

While I love to pray for others, and welcome your prayer requests should you have any, I was wondering if you could pray for me? That I would be able to further wait patiently for God to bring me the desires of my heart, namely marriage, while I partake in one of the greatest jobs I can think of right now....praying and interceding on the behalf of others.

Thank you for your continued interest and support of this ever changing and always crazy journey I'm on with God. I wouldn't have it any other way. :D

God bless you all!!!!






Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Lines Of Time

Hard to believe it’s been 6 months since I came back from Costa Rica! And while I recognize it’s been that long I am also aware that it’s been several months since my last blog entry! So, apologies to all of you who, faithfully, check and follow my blog. I should really keep up with things better. I guess part of my procrastination comes from not that much happening in my life….well, nothing earth shattering anyway. :D Therefore, in an effort to get you caught up on what’s been happening in my life and to avoid being overly verbose (wordy) while doing it, I thought I would provide a timeline of dates and events that have marked the past 6 months. I’ll keep it as short and sweet as possible. :D November 20, 2011 – I return to my home country of Canada and to my home in Calgary, Alberta. This was a prompting from God to return a full month earlier than I was originally ticketed to return. November 22, 2011 – God speaks loudly and clearly of His next mission and country for me…CUBA!! December 2011 – Early January 2012 – Time spent with family in Saskatchewan while resting and recovering from CR as well as processing and sharing all the incredible and life changing things God did in Costa Rica! This included God revealing His purposes for me: Prayer Warrior, Spiritual Mother/Mentor, and Leader. This time of rest and respite also allowed me to seek God’s heart for Cuba and to purchase a bilingual Bible. January 16, 2012 – Began a full time job in downtown Calgary working for a small oil and gas exploration company. January 29, 2012 – Gave a presentation to my home church of my time in Costa Rica and with YWAM. February 2012 – God opened a door for me to pursue an opportunity to go to Cuba through YWAM involving me joining a team from the Cartagena, Colombia base for their outreach phase. March 2012 – It’s been over a month since the Cuba opportunity came without further correspondence. Mid-March 2012 – Found a place to live!!! A 20 minute walk to work, located just outside of downtown! Woo hoo!! Late March 2012 – The door I thought God was opening, widely, for me to go to Cuba closed but God, in His faithfulness, opened a subsequent door to partner with my home church and come alongside to encourage and be a prayer warrior for several of the female youth leaders of the church!! April 2012 – In spite of not fully understanding the ‘why’s’ behind Cuba not working out, I walk forward in preparing to move into my own place on May 1 and just keep trusting in God’s timing and way in my life. April 23, 2012 – God places a strong desire on my heart to start a prayer journal. With each person or situation God gives me to pray for, I remain obedient to Him in sending notes to those I pray for. To let them know that God hears them and that He will answer!!! May 1, 2012 – Move in to my own place!!! It’s a small space but it works for me!! :D My parents come to visit and hang out as well as go to service at my home church with me the day before they leave. Present – Still working full time, living in my place, waiting on God……OH, waiting on God….STILL…LONGER!!! *sigh* But, waiting as patiently as possible and finally, after many years, I am able to live in the moment and be in the here and now and really focus on what God wants me to do and be for Him. Praise point: After many years of praying, I find that I have joy and contentment in all situations and every circumstance….well, for the most part. :D I’m still human, after all. Hee hee My relationship with Jesus has become closer and more intimate in these past months, more so recently, with Him showing me how He sees me. As His child, bride, lover, and wife I have come to embrace all the things He sees in me and shows me in my daily surrendered walk with Him. While the blessings have been many, I have also encountered many spiritual attacks as I walk closer to God and begin to fulfill His many purposes that He has for me. But I continue to trust in God and be encouraged by His words to me in Exodus 14:14 – “The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still.” I’ve come to rely on His strength and protection in times of great battle from the enemy. Praise God, for He is faithful!! The Lord also continues to guide me and He speaks to me of things He desires to do in me and through me, to which I surrender. For it is my heart’s desire to become the woman He always intended me to become and allow Him to refine me, any way He sees fit, for what He has prepared for me to do. See, pretty short and sweet! But, never fear, there is more to come as my next blogs will be more on a reflective note as I live life day to day and continue to trust, believe, and love God! I know that everything will come according to His time and His way. God bless you all for your faithfulness and for your words of encouragement and prayer upon me and my life!

Thursday, February 23, 2012

Introspection...




Is defined as the, ‘Contemplation of one’s own thoughts, feelings, and sensations; self-examination; heart-searching.’

As I daily live out this life of following God and surrendering to what God wishes to do in and through me, as well as remaining physically ready for whatever comes next, there exists a common denominator within me. One that has caused me great introspection throughout this faith walk. I suspect it will keep resonating within me until the denominator is quenched once and for all…but can it? The denominator I speak of is feeling alone.

I have often found myself standing in the midst of people, even chaos, and being unable to deny the unmistakable gnawing of feeling so alone. “But you are not alone, my Child,” God says. “I know I’m not totally alone God for I have You.” I reply. “But I really do feel alone, Lord.” I add.

I can’t seem to explain or describe my ‘aloneness’ to properly match the dynamics of what that feeling stirs within me. Quite often I have to be content to feel alone and move forward while questions of, “Will I ever stop feeling like a foreigner in a strange land? Will I ever stop feeling so alone?” make a mess of my already perplexed mind.

So my heart-searching plays on at times, especially if my mind is not otherwise distracted. I never thought following God this closely would be like this. I’ve experienced great and tragic things while following my Savior closely over these past years. Hard to believe that May of this year will mark 5 years since I was saved…saved from literal death and from the downward spiral I so thought provokingly devised to follow. God had something else in mind…greatness, purpose, direction. Those are not small things to balk at but it doesn’t mean that coming into those things did not come at a price. Some of the greatest blessings from God came at a great price but I can honestly say that every single one of those sacrifices that I made to step deeper into His presence were worth it.

They say, “Don’t have any regrets.” Before God got a hold of me, I lived a smeared and dirty life filled with regrets. Regrets for all the horrible things I did and how unworthy those horrible things made me feel about myself. Then God said my name and all of that changed in an instant and I felt the hand of God release me from every regret and sinful deed and I was freed. Now I live a life knowing I will never have regrets because when my heart is impressed to help someone, I’ll help. When I’m prompted to tell someone I care or that I love them, I will do the same. Just because I feel alone, doesn’t mean I can’t extend a word of encouragement to someone else who might be feeling the same.

We all long to be loved and cared for and our hearts really do cry out for God but so many don’t realize that it’s a cry for God to fill their lives with everything that He has for them. I often cry out to God from my heart for all the desires that are housed there. But God's best takes time and that means I must wait. Waiting is hard but losing out on God's best for me is going to be much harder. So I have to wait and I have to be patient. LOL I can barely type that word without laughing out loud for I am not the most patient woman but my many experiences with God have, well, stretched me to grow into an easier state of being patient when I need to be...or maybe when He needs me to be. :D

As long as I have known God, intimately, I know He has a sense of humor. I can’t always say that it’s the kind of humor that I can truly appreciate but it does make Him easier to relate to. He knows my inner hurts and needs and He is always working to bring about fulfillment of the many purposes He has had in mind for me before I came to be. In turn, I know the commitment I have made to Him because of wanting His very best for me. I’ve experienced too much of His best to NOT want it all the time in every area of my life.

As for my aloneness? Well, someone reminded me of how alone Paul must have felt…doing God’s will and being heavily persecuted for doing so. So much that he only had a few good friends who stood by him as he ran the race marked out for him by God. To bring the good news to those who needed it the most even though Paul knew he would be tortured for it. My heart goes out to Paul, but it was as though his dedication to God always seemed to mask that aloneness and he just kept going.

In my own experience, every time I've been met with this feeling of being alone, God has always met me there, saying in His still small voice, "You're never alone, beloved, for I am here with you." His voice soothes and satiates me until the next time I feel alone for it won't truly be satiated until I'm with Him for eternity.

Until then, I hold on to the lyrics from one of my favorite songs that speaks directly to my aloneness. It's 'Here With Me' by MercyMe.

I long for your embrace
Every single day
To meet you in this place
And see you face to face

Will you show me?
Reveal yourself to me
Because of your mercy
I fall down on my knees

And I can feel your presence here with me
Suddenly I'm lost within your beauty
Caught up in the wonder of your touch
Here in this moment I surrender to your love

You're everywhere I go
I am not alone
You call me as your own
To know you and be known

You are holy
And I fall down on my knees

I can feel your presence here with me
Suddenly I'm lost within your beauty
Caught up in the wonder of your touch
Here in this moment I surrender to your love

I surrender to your grace
I surrender to the one who took my place

I can feel your presence here with me
Suddenly I'm lost within your beauty
Caught up in the wonder of your touch
Here in this moment I surrender:

I can feel your presence here with me
Suddenly I'm lost within your beauty
Caught up in the wonder of your touch
Here in this moment I surrender to your love

Saturday, February 18, 2012

The Next Chapter




Having finished the 'kiros' of Costa Rica and successfully graduating from the Discipleship Training School, it didn't take long for God to reveal the next steps He had in mind for me once I returned to the familiar and welcome comforts of my home in Canada (November 20, 2011). In fact, it was within the first week of my return that God began impressing upon my heart the next country He wants me to go....Cuba!! That's all He gave me, a new country but no indication as to the 'why's' or 'what for's', just a destination.

Meanwhile, I settled back into 'normal' life and took some much needed time for rest and processing at my parent's place for the month of December 2011 and part of January 2012. It was there that God further impressed His next steps along with a prompting to buy a Spanish-English Bible. So when I returned to my home in Calgary, Alberta, I quickly ordered the Bible and waited on God to further direct me.

While I was seeking God, I was also sharing this news with others including the pastors of my home church and with friends and family. I just didn't know the particulars behind going. But it doesn't matter to me in the least for I know that if God calls me to go somewhere, He'll be there with me and provide for me in every single way. The many unknowns behind why I'm going and what I'll be doing don't really phase me, it just excites me as I know there will be something incredible that comes out of this next chapter....just like incredible things came out of my seemingly inconspicuous first trip to Costa Rica last year with Samaritan's Purse in distributing shoeboxes to kids in the province of Alajuela, Costa Rica.

So, in speaking with my pastor and his wife, they formulated a game plan of not only getting my experiences and adventures out to members of my home church but also to come alongside me in prayer on the newest revelations from God. One element of this game plan came as an opportunity and privilege, on my part, to share my time in Costa Rica with my home church. So, on January 29, 2012, I hosted a luncheon which included a presentation of some of the things I was a part of (including the movements of God) while in the country of Costa Rica. You can take a look at the presentation on my Facebook page if you are on Facebook or receive it when I email it to others who may not be on Facebook.

Unfortunately, there are no notes that go with each slide because I ad libbed everything I said. The slides were purely a prompt to what I would say next. :D Sorry....you really had to be there to get the full effect of my excitement in sharing with everyone. So have a look and enjoy!

I'll be including more details and updates about Cuba and what my time there might look like in the coming weeks. So stay tuned!!!!! :D

Aside from that I continue to pursue God and His ways for me while I wait for Him in many areas of my life. I surrender to Him daily and what He may want to do in me and through me and how He might want me to minister to others and share Him with them. So far it's been mindblowing for me how God sees me to be effective for Him in the kingdom and how much He DOES want to use me no matter what kind of day I might be having! There are times when I just have to unplug from the world and plug IN to the Lord. Whether that's through prayer, reading His Word or simply listening to some powerful worship music....God is my inspiration that brings me back on track and I fall more deeply into Him each time. :D

At times I can't help reflecting on how much easier life was when I was in Costa Rica....being surrounded by God 24/7 whether it was through people, surroundings or circumstances. I was in this bubble with God and it was the best for me but I also knew what would come after DTS, the return to reality and real life. To go swimming without my life preserver (God) in a way and just keep my eyes on God who would always swim slowly ahead of me, watching every movement of the waters to filter out anything that would harm or distract me.

He does that daily, saving me from myself at times and what can become ridiculous distractions but distractions, nonetheless. God saves me and firmly holds me in His hand while He pours His love, mercy and grace upon me like a warm shower. All I do is stand there and sigh under the weightless pressure of the water as it rains down on me. How great and merciful He is and how faithful He is to everything He has promised me!! I, like many others, believe this year 2012 to be one of great change not only personally but also for the world. I just keep looking to God for so many things and know that He'll answer in great ways....mindblowing ways!

Stay tuned for more later! :D

Friday, December 16, 2011

Sweet Finale


YWAM San Jose, Costa Rica!!!


Before attending the DTS (Discipleship Training School) program at YWAM in San Jose, Costa Rica for five months, my life was very comfortable. I had my own place with my own space and could do what I wanted, when I wanted. Life was good. Unfortunately, I had become stagnant in my faith. I wasn’t growing, just coasting. On top of that I seemed to struggle with the same things when it came to my faith; loving God radically, trusting God implicitly and believing God completely. Even though God kept challenging me in every one of these areas on a recurring basis, there was always something holding me back from breaking through each area and claiming victory.

But in obeying God and following Him to Costa Rica a second time, it was more critical that I go and face a great unknown than to stay where I was and risk having what flame still burned in me, go out. I needed to follow God to YWAM and nothing and no one was going to stop me. I knew there was a great purpose in me going and remaining there for the entirety of the schooling based on the urgency of God’s call on my life during my first trip to Costa Rica in March 2011. A calling that included God’s desire to train, teach and prepare me, but for what I didn’t know.

Obeying what God was telling me to do and where to go was far more important than considering the great unknowns that might lie ahead in going. It wasn’t long, after arriving at the YWAM base, before I came to know that God’s desire for me was to also challenge and stretch me as well as work on my character.

The challenging and stretching came immediately in trying to adapt to a community living lifestyle while learning to be a student again. But that was offset by the lecture content that was part of the Lecture Phase (first 12 weeks), which was something I could really sink my teeth into. Aside from obeying God in going to YWAM, it was my great desire to cultivate a more personal and intimate relationship with God than I had. Good thing because aside from YWAM training and preparing people to enter the mission field, one of its key components was to help you develop a deep and intimate relationship with God. So I knew I was in the right place and on the right track. As unbelievable as this new world was to me, I knew that I was smack dab in the middle of God’s will for me which was where I wanted to be. Be careful what you wish for??? LOL

As for working on my character, that came in a variety of different forms. Whether it was community living, work duties or being in a team setting 24/7, my character was continuously being worked on....kind of like the way a hammer hits an anvil when working and shaping a piece of metal into a useable tool, I being the piece of metal. The ‘workings’ were painful and, at times, difficult to learn but in exchange for the pain, I gained a greater insight into the awesome grace and mercy of God especially when my frustration levels would reach their peak. One great lesson taught to me during those times was how important it was to rely and depend on God for everything, big and small, in my life there. So much so that every time I was tested and got flustered, I ran to God, giving the situation completely over to His care and God would always bring about the answer in creative and blessed ways!

Meanwhile, as each week passed in the Lecture Phase and each topic became better than the last, prayers past and present were being answered in incredible and supernatural ways. Some of those answers were; falling in love with the Word of God, receiving my breakthrough in loving God radically (during Father Heart of God week), peace while performing my work duties, surrendering my rights, extending grace to others and so many more!!


My birthday spent with my DTS family during Lecture Phase!
Back Row (From left to right): Jake, Cherise, Montana, Joseph, Marianela (leader), Cristina.
Middle Row (From left to right): Brandon, Me, Kristen, Becky, Brayan.
Front Row (From left to right): Jimmy, Elle, Diana (teacher), Buka.

Soon the Lecture Phase came to an end and it was time to prepare for NIKO. This was a one week survival camp that took us to a remote location in the province of Cartago. The name NIKO means to overcome and no word could have been more applicable to my time there than that. It was the most physically, mentally and spiritually intense week that I had ever experienced in my entire life. I did physical feats that I never thought I could do but that forced me to not only depend even more heavily upon the strength of God for my strength but to also push myself even further when I hit a wall of exhaustion or discouragement.


There was more than just brutal times at NIKO...there was the beauty and majesty of our surroundings! Praise God!!

Due to the nature and honoured tradition of NIKO and its purpose, I am unable to disclose specific details but just to give you a taste of what this almost forty year old body did included; scaling up mountainsides and waterfalls vertically, belaying down a mud wall and walking across a web of loosely intertwined tree roots while gazing down a 200 or more foot drop if I were to misstep. Oh, and I was able to do 40 consecutive push ups, regular not modified, surpassing even some of my male counterparts! Sorry, guys. LOL But despite this gruelling, frustrating, challenging and intense week, it was the perfect segue for what lay ahead....Outreach.


GIRL POWER at NIKO!!!!

Outreach Phase was an 8 week period taking what we learned in the classroom and applying it to a real life missionary and ministry setting. It was week two or three of the Lecture Phase that our team began praying for God’s will to be revealed regarding where we were to go, the theme of outreach and if we would be staying together as one team or if we would be split up. A couple days after arriving at the YWAM base, God began speaking to me not only about my team members and the incredible purpose that each person had but also where we would be doing outreach, in the country of Costa Rica.

So when it came to praying for God to show me His heart for our team in outreach, He wasted no time in revealing to me the many things He saw in our team. That we would be ministering throughout the country of Costa Rica and that our team would ignite the country with the flame of the Holy Spirit. In fact, while praying, God showed me a vision of our team’s affect on the country of Costa Rica with a map of Costa Rica and our team moving like a flame would as it consumes a piece of paper. Except this flame was the Holy Spirit that made the entire country glow with a light that could be seen around the world! Woah!

I shared my vision and words from God to the leadership and they affirmed me in saying that they had received the very same things from God. Double woah!! On top of that, God had spoken to the leaders that the theme of our outreach would be ‘justice’ which had been a recurring theme within members of the team and God’s greater purpose in bringing us all together. In weeks following, leadership revealed that our outreach would not only take us throughout Costa Rica but that we would be spending time in each of the 7 provinces of Costa Rica; Cartago, Heredia, Limon, Guanacaste, Puntarenas, Alajuela and San Jose. We would also be participating in a number of ministries like; organizing church programs, preaching, youth events, children’s ministry, Bible distribution, construction and many more.

Meanwhile, God was still challenging me in the two areas I was praying and seeking breakthroughs in; trusting God implicitly and believing God completely. And it was during week three of outreach that my breakthrough in trusting God implicitly was obtained. Unfortunately, it came in the form of a serious foot injury (tendon rupture) that had me staying back from a week and a half of ministry. However, the unfortunate turned to fortunate while I was lying on a table in a room at the hospital to await the x-ray of my foot. I know what you’re thinking, how could lying on an x-ray table be considered fortunate? Well, it started with a question, a question from God. As I was lying on the table, alone in the room and waiting for the tech to come in to take the x-rays, God spoke, “Do you trust me, Melissa?” I hesitated before answering, “Yes, Lord.” God wasn’t convinced so He asked me a second time. “Do you trust me, Melissa?” This time, without hesitation, I answered confidently, “Yes, Lord, I trust You!” It became even clearer to me that this injury was DEFINITELY a God thing!

It was hours later that I learned of my serious injury and further instructions to wear the walking boot (picture and story in the ‘Das Boot’ post) all the time for three weeks except to ice it three times a day and shower. Then I had to go back to the hospital after the three weeks and if all looked well, I would begin 12 weeks of rehab. Ugh. The injury happened on a Wednesday and the diagnosis came the day after (Thursday). But in spite of hearing all of that, I couldn’t ignore the overwhelming peace that was within me. Sunday came and it was time for my team to head off to Puerto Viejo, Limon, Costa Rica for a week while I was to stay back and begin to fulfill God’s purpose shown to me weeks prior during the lecture phase. A purpose that included; answering divine appointments on base set up by God and being a prayer warrior and intercessor for the base, my team and myself.

It was literally hours after my team left that God spoke loud and clear by asking me, “Melissa, do you believe that I can heal you?” I could hardly contain my excitement when I replied, “OF COURSE I believe you can heal me, Lord!” From that moment on, the blessings didn’t stop. On top of being a part of several divine appointments, I was moved to a room in hospitality so that the bathroom and shower would be on the same level. That meant not having to climb stairs! Yes!! Then as the week began, God called me into solitude while telling me how, when and for whom to pray along with sending Scripture and words of encouragement to my team.

Thursday morning (three days before my team was due to come back from Puerto Viejo) I was getting ready to go to the prayer room on base when God spoke, “Take off your boot and walk on your foot.” After a brief hesitation I took off my walking boot, planted my bare foot on the floor and began to walk. There was no pain. I stood there in disbelief while an excitement began to rise in me.

Saturday morning came (the day before my team was due to return from Puerto Viejo) and as I was getting ready for my day, walking boot on, God spoke saying, “Take off the boot and jump up and down.” I answered with, “Seriously?” God didn’t respond to that. LOL Obviously He was serious in what He was commanding me to do. So I took the boot off, placed my feet on the floor and started jumping up and down. There was no pain. My eyes quickly filled with tears that started streaming down my face as I said, “Thank you, God”, over and over again. Moments later the tears turned to laughter as I celebrated the fulfillment of God’s healing question to me days prior. Of course I knew He would heal me I just didn’t know when but when it happened, I knew my breakthrough had come in trusting God implicitly and that I would trust Him in all things from that moment on, no matter what.

Once my team returned Sunday morning, I shared God’s miracle healing with my roommates which was met with dropped jaws and questions of if I would be joining the team to finish outreach. Not only did I say a resounding, “YES!” but I would be going without my walking boot, as God had commanded. So, knowing all of that, I started my packing for the remainder of outreach with my team, which would be 6 weeks. Monday morning we packed our things on top of the YWAM van and stuffed 16 of us into the van and we were off!! Some of the places we visited and did ministry in were; Jaco, Cobano, Los Chiles, Moneteverde, Ciudad Quesada, Las Palmeras, Sarchi and more!


I found a bunch of orchid plants growing alongside a wall!!! Incredible! (taken at the Methodist Camp we stayed at in Ciudad Quesada, Alajuela, Costa Rica).


MORE beautiful flowers in Ciudad Quesada!!!

As I began my remaining outreach journey with my DTS family, in the back of my mind I knew that there was still one area that I was seeking a breakthrough in which was believing God completely. Believing Him for everything He had told, shown and promised me for my life. The struggle to take God at His word with those things seemed too fantastic for me because they were all my dreams, hopes and desires that, I guess, I just didn’t think would be fulfilled because of how much I wanted them. But I should have known God better than that, especially after ALL I had been experiencing with Him in the DTS alone!! But it was during a time of rest and refreshment in Cobano, Puntarenas, Costa Rica, that I received this final breakthrough. After a long week of ministry in Jaco, Puntarenas, our leaders brought us to this remote camp in Cobano to enjoy three days of restoration and fun to get ready for our next outreach demands.


Camp building in Cobano, Puntarenas, Costa Rica.

We arrived on a Monday and it was the next morning (Tuesday) that I went for a walk on the property to spend some quiet time with God after my own morning devotion. My walk brought me to a place in a forest by a flowing river and as I stood there gazing at all the beauty around me and resting in God’s presence, He suddenly spoke, “Do you trust me? Do you love me? Do you believe me?” I could answer, “Yes” confidently to all of them except the third one. I was still challenged in believing God for all the things that God had shown and told me since the beginning of DTS. Even my morning devotion challenged me by telling me that my unanswered prayers were only delays. I had been struggling with believing God for so many things but with this message in my morning devotional and my time with God in the forest, with Him challenging me, I was gaining confidence each time He would ask me the three questions.

I stood there for a few more moments until I heard the movement and sound of an ape in the trees to my left. As I began to listen to this creature, it seemed to be speaking to me, saying, “Walk.” I was a bit taken back and listened again to see if what I had heard was true and the ape ‘spoke’ again saying, “Walk.” So I started to walk back to the main house at the camp. When I got back, I noticed everyone was up in the open area of the building. I had forgotten about the special activity of waiting for God while being blindfolded that we would be doing. After apologizing to my leaders, I quickly found a place on the floor and blindfolded myself, then waited for God. It wasn’t long before God started asking me the same three questions He had been asking me in the forest.

A few moments later, one of my team leaders came next to me and began reading Ephesians 3:20-21. After she read it she said that God was telling her to tell me that I needed to trust and believe Him completely for everything, even when I don’t see anything or understand. That I should trust Him completely in and for all things because they are so much more incredible and unbelievable than I can possibly imagine. With all that, I started to cry and just kept repeating, over and over again, that I believed God. I told God I believed Him, confidently, when He asked me while I was blindfolded. My breakthrough had come. The one breakthrough I had been wanting for so long and especially during outreach. I now felt so strong and so confident. Then another of my leaders came and read James 5:16. Then another of my leaders came and read Isaiah 32:15-17 and then she told me that God wanted to reveal and show His plan for me. That He would show me in visions and images His path and plan for my life, which brought to mind all the things that He had already been doing during the lecture phase at the base with all the visions and dreams that He had given me plus everything He had been showing me during outreach and that it would all continue even after my time in DTS.

So many wonderful, extraordinary and difficult things happened in, through and for me during my time in Costa Rica. It’s difficult to pick just a couple things that stood out to me because it was the entire experience of DTS and my DTS family that served as the greatest source of challenge, stretching, discipline, humility and blessing (good and difficult) that has changed me in dramatic ways and that will remain with me for the rest of my life. Ways that can only be described in the things that God revealed to me while I was in Costa Rica like being; a woman of powerful prayer, a fearless and bold witness of God and His goodness to others, a spiritual mother, and a woman who loves, trusts and believes God completely in all situations....just to name a few.


More of God's majesty and beauty at one of our places of ministry, Ciudad Quesada, Alajuela, Costa Rica.

I have been changed in ways that are, at times, difficult to describe but I know, unequivocally, that I needed to go there and go through a transforming five months in order to be firmly set on the road that God always wanted me to be on for Him. I know that it will be a difficult road but it will also be one overflowing with surprises, blessings and miracles of every conceivable kind! And I’d rather live a life of difficulty and discomfort than miss out on God’s very best for me! I just can’t take that chance in not knowing what could have been if only I had done what God wanted me to do. There is extraordinary blessing in all that God calls us to do and be for Him. Far too extraordinary to miss out on!! :D


I received a BEAUTIFUL bouquet of flowers from the Dodero family on my graduation night!!


Graduation night of the July 2011 DTS!!! What a good lookin' group if I do say so!!! :D
Back Row (From left to right): Brayan, Jake, Morgan (leader), Joseph, Brandon, Kristen, Buka.
Front Row (From left to right): Me, Lauryn (leader), Elle, Becky, Cristina, Cheris, Montana, Marianela (leader), Jose (leader and husband to Marianela), Jimmy.

Saturday, December 10, 2011

Stay Tuned....

Hello everyone! I know it's been a while since I last posted to my blog. I can't begin to ask for enough forgiveness from you, my loyal readers.

I do promise, however, that I will be updating my blog in the weeks to come as there is a lot to report of God's movement and goodness while I was attending school and participating in the mission fields of Costa Rica during my time there over the past five months!

So, stay tuned!!!!